RSV

Respiratory syncytial virus is one of those things you hear about in babies and hope that yours never gets it. The kind of diagnosis that frequently gets the sad gasp and "poor baby" comment. I read that over 250,000 babies under the age of one are hospitalized every year, and that 500 of those die. 

But, when your baby gets sick the name of what it is or all those numbers or the comments - or anything - matters. The only thing that mattered in my whole world was that my baby was sick and I couldn't make it better. As a mom, you're suppose to make it better, yet the best I could do was try to keep him content without actually improving his sickness. 

Upon receiving the virus you will become symptomatic within 48 hours. Nolan didn't show symptoms until last Monday during our MO visit. Which means, he almost certainly got it from someone who had been at my parents house, as we hadn't been anywhere else. Several of the adults had cold-like symptoms (which is also what I got on the 2nd day there) and RSV usually presents as cold-like symptoms in adults - and sometimes even in other babies if they have really good immune systems.

So, as childish as it sounds, I was at least minorly frustrated. Of course, I know no one would do anything with purposeful intent, and I know many people were eager to see us (and we were eager to see them), but if you're sick take the high road and pass on the visit. Between Nolan's heart stuff, acid reflux, and reflux related wheeze... we have enough medical stuff going on.  

Nolan was premature, has a minor heart condition, and has had previous upper respiratory complications. What an excellent host he was for this terrible illness. 

His symptoms were very spontaneous. In the early am hours on Sunday Nolan was wheezing and restless through his sleep - or lack thereof. When we got him up and ready for the day on Monday he seemed to be having some difficulty breathing and had a bad rattle in his chest. 

We decided to be safe and saw a pediatrician at the clinic. She tested for RSV, which came back negative. He had a low grade temp of 99.4 and not much else. She guessed it was a minor cold/virus and would be fine, but suggested we come back if he got worse. 

Monday night was awful. I know he couldn't have got much sleep, because I don't think Cory or I got any. 

He was more congested Tuesday morning, with even more labored breathing and tighter wheezes. So, we hauled ourselves back up to the clinic. This time the doctor ordered a -flu test, chest x-ray, and a repeat on the RSV. The RSV was positive and the chest x-ray showed minor inflammation in his right lung. 

She told us we should probably carry on with our travel plans to return home, in order to get back to our doctors who were familiar with Nolan's other stuff. I seriously hated the thought of putting my RSV baby through airports and plane rides. Not just because he was sick and traveling is stressful, but also because I couldn't stand the thought of him spreading it to other people. 

Nonetheless, we did. I was the crazy one going behind him wiping everything down, including plane seats and trays and windows. I'm not sure it did much good. But, at least I tried something. 

Nolan didn't get much rest at all on our day of travel, and he was a very whiny, sick little boy by the time we got home. He wouldn't nurse or drink anything, and absolutely refused any solid food. 

His cough was constant and frequently resulted in spit up/vomiting. His temp was a consistent 102-103 without any breaks despite our attempts. 

When we saw our regular pediatrician she was clearly worried for him. But, they have a very family centered practice out here. She definitely wanted Nolan to remain at home until it was 100% not worth it. As long as he had oxygen above 94% and he was having at least 4 wet diapers a day, she said it was doable to keep him at home - where he could relax and rest better. She even mentioned the concern of admitting him to a hospital on the basis of him catching something else. I prefer this strategy anyway. When I was in and out of the hospital through most of my childhood I remember getting so frustrated because of how impossible it is to rest in a hospital. 

For RSV, they only admit for oxygen or fluids for dehydration. It's a virus and there's not much you can do for it but damage control. We were told that when a lot of mucus gets in the lungs causing the real prominent wheezing and labored/stomach breathing it means the body is using all of its resources to keep the oxygen level up and exhausting them constantly. So, she told us (b/c Nolan's pulse ox was border line at 95%) to really watch his breathing and if it became too labored, she'd want him on oxygen to give his little body a break from working so hard.

We were going to the doctor every single day. In 6 days, he'd lost 12 ounces putting him at 15 pounds, 13 ounces. Smaller than he was at his 9 month check up. 

On day 6 we weren't seeing any improvements and the virus usually peaks on the 5th or 6th day. They were on the line of going ahead with pneumonia diagnosis and starting antibiotics (b/c pneumonia is so hard to diagnose in combo with RSV b/c RSV looks as bad as pneumonia on a chest x-ray). 

My baby was so sick. He was lethargic and lifeless. He literally just wanted to be packed around. When you packed him, he didn't even have the energy to raise his head up and instead kept it rested on your shoulder. His cry was pitifully weak, and often he had silent tears. His voice was hoarse and nearly non-existent when he tried to use it. His eyes were a constant glossy wet and accented with dark purple shadows beneath them. He had a red little nose from having it wiped so often. His complexion was a ghostly, pale, white. Sad. Sad. Sad.

It was a whole new kind of heartbreak. I know it's just a virus and parents suffer much worse. But it was unbearable to see him in such discomfort and be so helpless.

Then, yesterday, on the 7th day his fever finally broke. Sort of, he's still running between 100.3-100.5. He started nursing a little bit and ate more food than he had in days. He smiled a little at daddy's peek-a-boos. He was only up in the night a handful of times. 

Last night, he was only up once! He had a full nurse session this morning and ate all his breakfast! Not so lucky for lunch time, but definite improvement. What a drastic turn around we had. In just 24 hours he went from complete food refusal to having an appetite back!

If we could just get the mucus under control! This baby's cough and wheezing are the worst! And his little nose is so congested.

He still just wants to be held and snuggle into you a lot, but he actually played with his toys this morning and crawled around. He shakily stood up for a bit. (this is after 3-4 days of barely moving, people!) 

Such a sight for sore eyes. 

Hopefully my sweet bug will be back to his ornery self any day now and we will have survived our first 'real' virus. Whew. 


p.s. Hopefully this is coherent, b/c I'm sick and sleep deprived too :/